Feeling Like it is Killing Your Dreams

Hello beautiful people!

4.8.18 Post

When it comes to our own stuff, our own growth, we often get trapped in our feelings. But when it comes to someone else’s stuff (i.e. our job) we do it despite feeling like it.

Ever heard of the song “Sitting, Waiting, Wishing” by Jack Johnson? Well, that’s what we do too often to our dreams. I’m a culprit. In fact, I have been one of the biggest culprits. But then, instead of sitting, waiting, and wishing, I started reading, watching, and exploring personal development topics. What I discovered was we all have one thing stopping us from working towards our dreams: feelings.

How often do you say to yourself (or others):

  • I don’t feel like it.
  • I’m not motivated to do it.
  • I don’t feel ready.

I’ve used the excuse of, “I don’t feel like it,” which also sounds like, “I’m not motivated to do this today,” plenty of times. And I still use it but I’m working on breaking the habit. And sometimes I don’t do something because I really do feel depleted and need to focus on something else. But if I am energized and still don’t feel like it, then I have to push myself to do it – fuck my feeling like it.

Sound harsh? It’s not.

In fact feelings, much like fear, have to be ignored if we want to live our lives fully. If we all did things when we felt like it or when the motivation was there, we wouldn’t get much done.

Imagine this scenario:

You wake up Monday energized and motivated to get started on the book you’ve always wanted to write. Work goes fine but you are a bit stressed because a deadline is fast approaching. However, you’re confident your team will rock it. After dinner you stare at the blank page for 5 minutes then finally are able to crank out a couple hundred words. You go to bed. You wake up on Tuesday still excited about your book but then you arrive at work and find out the deadline has been pushed up a week. Now, you and your team will have to work twice as hard.

You arrive home exhausted and don’t feel like working on your book so you again stare at the page for 5 minutes then decide to call it a night. Wednesday you wake up less energized and less motivated to write your book. Work is again stressful but you manage to get another 100 words before calling it a night. Thursday you don’t feel like going to work but you do. After all, the bills won’t pay themselves. You come home and don’t feel like writing so you don’t. You’ll write more tomorrow, you say. Friday comes and you unwind from your week with a glass (maybe a bottle) of wine and a new book.

Saturday you sleep in – you had a busy workweek – and the last thing you want to do is work on your book so you catch up on some shows instead. Sunday you pick up the book you started on Friday and get inspired to write. You go to your work in progress, read what you’ve written and think it’s garbage, wonder why you can’t be as good as the book you’re reading, get unmotivated, and walk away from your dream because you’ll start again tomorrow. You sit down to plan your week and see that your weekly word count goal was 2,000 and you realize you did not get close. But it’s okay because this next week will be different.

Monday through Friday comes and goes and you didn’t write one word because you didn’t feel like it because the job you only kinda like exhausted you and you just wanted to unwind after work. A whole month goes by and out of your 8,000-word goal you’ve only produced 600 because you didn’t feel like writing.

So how did that author you love get so good? They showed up and wrote even when they didn’t feel like it.

So, yeah, fuck feelings if we want to accomplish our goals. This is the truth that slapped me in the face. Why am I not where I want to be? I let my feelings stop me.

I trained myself to love comfort more than actually working on my dreams.

Motivate comes from the Latin word movere which means “to move.” When we move – take action – that’s when we get motivated. We don’t need to wait for motivation because we create it with our actions. I’ve found that 9 times out of 10, if I don’t feel motivated to do something, once I start doing it I actually enjoy it and keep doing it. 

And I know that it’s difficult. Like I said, I know comfort all to well, but the question becomes: do we believe enough in ourselves to get up, show up, and do the work even when we don’t feel like it?

We owe it to ourselves.

We owe it to our dreams.

We owe it to our wild hearts to show up and put in the work – feelings be damned!

 

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